Hanging around in the Army Camp when a villager came towards me. She looked right at me and came over – didn’t say a word or anything. I didn’t know what was gonna happen. I imagined a lot of things in my head, but I never expected this – she stopped next to me and clapped. Yeah, clapped. Her hands. I couldn’t tell if it was a “Hey, you’re cool” kind of clap, or a “This is sarcastic” kind of clap. It may have even been a “I have some dust on my hands and I’m trying to get it off” kind of clap. Hard to tell. Whatever it was, it was weird.
Tough day today. There was an attack on another village and I wasn’t chosen to go. Barbarians went and I didn’t. I mean, I don’t necessarily NEED to go but it makes me feel bad when a barbarian is chosen over me. Yeah, they have swords and stuff but I can smash stuff. Also, I’m big and I know to go right at the enemy’s defenses – do barbarians know that? (Here’s the answer, they don’t).
Seeing them go and not me was pretty humiliating. I’m pretty sure the archers in the archer tower saw it all and were talking about me. I went over there and asked what they were talking about and they just said something about their arrows. Yeah, right.
Why don’t I have a name? Just “Giant.” It’s bad enough when you look like everyone else, but when you all have the same name too? One time, a bunch of us were eating and an archer said “Giant, you have something on your face.” Well, maybe fifty of us all reached up to our faces. I mean, c’mon, that’s just not fair. It’s also bad in an attack like if a wizard yells “Giant, you go that way, I’ll go this way”, you know ALL the giant’s are going to go that way. It’s stupid.
So, what name would I choose if I could? Maybe Kevin? Or Tyler?
Maybe I would even just go with a nickname like “Stretch”, cause I’m so tall – although, now that I think about it, I’m exactly as tall as every other giant. That’s why when you go shopping at the giant store, there is only one outfit on sale in one size – because we all LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME!
One day, some giant is gonna get greedy and steal something – like some dark elixir – and people are going to try to describe the thief and be like “He was giant height, with giant colored hair and wearing a giant’s outfit and… well, he was a giant!” Good luck solving that crime.
Whatever. I’m gonna go get ready for the day, but instead of looking in a mirror, I’ll just look at another giant. Yeah, that’s right, I’m bitter.